


Stepping into the Next Room

by bearinapotatosack



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Afterlife, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Battle of Hogwarts, Bittersweet Ending, Canonical Character Death, Death, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Harry Potter Dies, What-If
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-17
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:20:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23704519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bearinapotatosack/pseuds/bearinapotatosack
Summary: What if Harry had chosen to stay dead?
Relationships: Albus Dumbledore & Harry Potter, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Remus Lupin/Nymphadora Tonks
Comments: 4
Kudos: 74





	Stepping into the Next Room

"I've got a choice?"

"Oh, yes," Dumbledore smiled at him. "I think if you decided not to go back, you would be able to… let's say…board a train?"

"And where would it take me?"

"On." Dumbledore said simply.

Silence. Harry's mind was racing with everything he'd just heard, Voldemort has the elder wand, Dumbledore had a right to all the Hallows and, apparently, so did he. 

The decision was strange, he'd been arguing in his mind as soon as he found out he had to die. One the one hand, he needed to fight, how could he know his friends were safe if he just stopped here? Years worth of work would be worthless, all the pain he'd experienced would have been for nothing. 

Yet he did like the sound of it all ending. That voice in the back of his head was willing him to give in, stay there. Just to stop. He remembered what he'd said after Sirius had died, ' _ I've had enough, I've seen enough, I want out, I want it to end! _ ' This was his chance, to finally get some rest. 

He took a deep breath and said, "I'm not going back, I'm going to go… on, as you put it," Harry couldn't look anywhere near Dumbledore's eyes, deciding to focus on his feet instead. "I know that you want to go back and fight but-" 

"This is not about what I want, rather the contrary, I offered you a choice for a reason, Harry," His voice was immeasurably calm, it was smooth and comforting like the place he was in. "I have guided you over the past few years so that you think, analyse and do what's right, for both our cause and yourself. You've thought about the cause a lot haven't you?"

The question was strange. He couldn't remember actively fighting towards the cause much earlier than his fifth year. There had been moments when he'd done what he deemed needed to be done, but now he was learning of how little he had cared for himself since he joined this world. 

Harry nodded and his mentor continued, "But there is one thing you should know, it is never too late to care for yourself, no matter how scary the world is, so you are doing no wrong by deciding what you have," The man smiled in a way that appeared almost unlike himself- although he had told him something he'd never done while alive. 

For a moment, there was nothing to say. Harry had chosen, Dumbledore would guide him on. He felt gracious for the calm, it was a similar feeling he used to get after Quidditch; covered in dirt and sweat yet euphoric as he shut his brain off. No more running, or planning, or trying to find answers. 

The war, for Harry, was over. He almost didn't care for anything else. Almost. (A realisation that made him debate whether it was peace or morbidity).

Chugging slowly along came a train, a pearly white copy of the Hogwarts Express that had no driver nor any smoke erupting from its chimney. Dumbledore turned to Harry, who had just woken from his trance, raised an arm, which the boy took and the two walked onto the train together.

* * *

The two were sat comfortably in a monochrome compartment, there was no view from the windows, no luggage in the rack. They spoke politely, on weirdly mundane topics, considering the circumstances. Dumbledore was even enticing Harry to talk further about his past- the better parts of it anyway. 

As the conversation ran dry, he let his mind wander to his friends, had Ron and Hermione killed Nagini yet? How many more had died? Did anyone know of what he'd done?

His conscience was torn, he was thinking of himself for the first time in a while and wasn't feeling too guilty about it. There was still guilt, mind you, about how he was leaving them; they were a team who had gone through a lifetime of struggles in around eight years. It was almost betrayal to leave them now. 

This thought spurred a request, "You said that I'm a true master of death," 

Dumbledore nodded. 

"Could I use this to see my friends one more time?" He felt the urge to explain himself, so continued. "I know I've made my decision but I need to see if they're okay, if they defeat Voldemort,"

He stood up, ready to stop the non existent driver as he opened the door to the compartment. There was no sign of the train slowing yet it didn't appear to be moving either, he didn't know how he was going to get back but he was determined to try.

"I imagine that if you desired to visit the battle, you would merely have to think of it, and it would happen,"

With that advice in mind, Harry concentrated on the chaos of the battle, the smoke in the air and screams of people all around him. The worry of students and the need to win. He felt a shift around him, no unease, just the gentle feeling of moving.

* * *

Harry opened his eyes. He was in the Forbidden Forest. Alone.

It was still, no death eaters, Voldemort and his followers were gone. Where? 

There was the sound of birds in the thinner parts of the forest. In the distance, no explosions or screams could be heard. The war had ended.

He turned around and saw the resurrection stone on the ground where he'd dropped it. From here, it looked ordinary, like it would cause no major harm. Harry, of course, knew better.

Out of curiosity, he bent down to pick it up, fully expecting his hand to go straight through. But it didn't. The sharp edges scratched his hand momentarily as he stood up and tossed it in his hand. No one appeared to him. No figures or ghosts.

It was just a stone. 

Now he knew he could touch things, he hatched a plan, a way to send himself off while also explaining why to his friends who were no doubt confused.

He made his way back to the castle, lost in thought as he neared the destruction. He peered around at the parts of the castle that were ravaged. The bridge was falling into the lake, towers were broken and entire walls had been demolished. Stray bricks cluttered the ground and glass crunched under his feet. 

He made his way into the courtyard, where the piles of debris towered over everyone, a few bodies of strangers lay on the floor, dusty and dead. A giant was covering a corridor, it too was dead. 

Then he saw his friends.

They were sat close to the bodies of Fred, Remus and Tonks. Ron had an arm thrown around Hermione, they were huddled together and had a look of shock and denial on their faces. The Weasleys were enclosed around the bodies, some were silently crying, others just stared in the distance. 

More people he knew were either motionless on the floor or clumped in groups, adding to the general sound of sobbing. 

As he approached further he saw something that had never crossed his mind, his own body.

He was strewn on the cluttered stone, eyes closed and no worry etched into the grooves along his forehead or cheeks. Strangely, his glasses were still intact and the dirt he'd accumulated was gone- probably the work of Mrs Weasley.

Amongst the chaos, Harry heard Ginny mumbling to herself, "Why did he just die? We've all fought so hard, he fought so hard and what did he get? Death?" 

He sighed and rubbed a hand along his face, an inch of denial threatening to take over. A fleeting thought of why made him stop momentarily until he shook himself and moved away to put his ability to touch to good use.

* * *

It had taken him a while, but after searching through the entire castle, he found some parchment and a spare quill. He sat down at a desk, one of the few that had survived the battle, and began to write down what he deemed a decent goodbye message.

He wanted to tell those close to him why he'd died, that he had a choice and took the one he felt was needed. He knew it wouldn't rid them of any grief, if anything they would be angrier knowing that he'd actively chosen not to return, without knowing if everything he was fighting for would win. 

With a final word, he stood up once more and moved to find a place where his friends could find the letter. He circled the castle, questioning if he should leave it in Dumbledore's office, circled again and sighed, until it came to him.

Hurrying down past the students, none of which could see him, he found himself back in the Great Hall, back in the debris and death. Not much had changed, people still cried quietly and others merely stared. 

With the rolled up parchment in his hand, he meandered around people, making his way to Hermione. When she turned her head to bury it into Ron's shoulder, Harry took his chance to discreetly open her bag and place it inside. He didn't know when they'd find it, but whenever they did, he hoped it helped. 

He took one last glance around the room, at the people he hoped he wouldn't see for decades to come and took a deep breath. 

Breathing carefully in and out, he soon found himself back on the plain white train in the company of Dumbledore.

* * *

The train stopped at a normal platform, it was nothing spectacular, merely plain white. Harry stood on the flat floor and cranked his neck to his right, one going columns and tracks that blended into light. To his left, a staircase and a door. 

That must be  _ the  _ door. 

For the first time since he'd been here, Harry felt unsettled by the silence, he couldn't even hear his own breaths. Was he even breathing if he was dead?

He moved around for a moment, trying to keep his thoughts in check as it finally hit him that this was it. This was the end. 

"So if I go through that door, that's it, I've gone on?" He said into the echoing quiet.

With a hum, Dumbledore responded, "You can still return, although I don't suspect that you would be entirely the same," 

Harry must have shown his confusion because the elderly man explained further.

"You have seen both life and the possibility of death, I can only theorise of the wonders and impairments that would come with returning fully from death," He joined him at his side and gazed at him, there was so much experience behind those eyes. 

It was strange, to move on with nothing there. No breeze to stroke his face, or words of kindness to cling onto as he took that last step. He clenched his hands and walked up the matte white stairs. 

The door appeared to be made of no substance Harry'd ever seen before. It was smooth and solid, the door handle had no glimmer yet moved smooth as he opened up the gateway to the beyond.

* * *

Godric's Hollow. That couldn't be the afterlife? Perhaps it was customised to a person?

The house was complete, lights were shining from the window and noise was erupting from the open doors and windows. Dainty plants covered the garden and the gravel crunched under his feet. 

Harry stepped into the hallway, he'd walked here before, in widely different circumstances. There were pictures of moments of his life on the walls: his first Christmas at Hogwarts, a match of Quidditch and many other scenes. 

He turned into the kitchen and almost fell in shock, his family, friends, everyone he'd lost on the way was here. Sirius, Remus and Tonks were clumped in a group, Fred was smiling while standing next some of the Order members he'd known had died. And in the middle, were his parents, there smiling faces making him feel warm and reinstating the feeling that he'd chosen right.

Beaming with joy, he hurried into their arms and finally, finally let himself relax. 

**Author's Note:**

> I had this idea, wrote a plan and eventually got round to writing it!
> 
> Feedback is greatly appreciated, your comments and kudos give me life!


End file.
